Greetings, DA-ites! You're all looking very sharp. How've you been? Did you do something new with your hair? Fab-oh.

I've got to be up for work in a wee bit less than eight hours, so I'm-a try and make this quick.

Ahem. Who's interested in some comission-free, commitment-free... and, um, Commmand & Conquer-free sketches of whatever character of their choosing?

The fact is, I haven't been drawing too much lately, and I figure some loose promises of drawings for folks other than my suave self might be a good motivator.

So, one pencil sketch goes to each of the first four (4) people who reply to this post. I can't guarantee the quality nor the awesometude content of said sketches, but I'll try to make them as interesting as I can in what time I have to draw them out. References and any character info for the subject would be mucho appreciated.

According to my user stats, 31 people "watch" me. Out of those, I honestly have no clue as to how many of them still visit DA, much less how many of them bother to subscribe to my journal entires. Four seems like a pretty solid number right now, but I might do this again sometime if there's enough of a demand for MOAR and/or everything goes swimmingly for this outing.

Bah, and here I was, saying I was going to make this short. Ta ta for now, you lovable little art monkeys, you!

Looks like I'm kinda, sorta back for now! Feels good to finally clear out that informative, but altogether preposterously long "survey" journal entry I did some ways back in September 2005.

With any luck I'll be able to drag myself out of this contemptable artist's block that I've been slogging through for the better part of this year, and get some serious drawing done!

To-do list

- Catch up and comment on friends' submitted Deviations and whatnot

- Make new user ID to replace terribly outdated current pic (**EDIT** Well, I guess there wasn't much to that particular task aside from grabbing the webcam, striking the usual "mouth agape" emo shot, and bam! Instant ID for all to love and cuddle)

- Draw more, dammit!

- Keep it on the flipside for real, dawg. You know how it is, homeslice.


Here's for a truely sextacular Summer '06! Love you all.

My DeviantART life partner, a girl who chooses to go by the codename "Katie", has requested I fill out an important e-document with scrawls of VALUBLE PERSONAL INFORMATION.

I, normally being the shy and reclusive type (watch out for runoff of sarcasm), would never (under normal circumstances) even think of following through with such a demand.

But...

Since I find it difficult to refuse the request of someone who is both lovely AND talented- not to mention possessing internal genitalia (EW. SEXUALLY-TRANSMITTED COOTIES), the following is my summarative "Yes, dear."

----

Seven things that scare you:
1. School/whether or not I'll be able to make a legitimate career out of my craft
2. SEX, SEX, SEX. (That's right, I am TEH 40 YEAR-OLD VIRGIN!* ... minus 20.) And while I'm on that...
3. Finding a nice girl who I care enough for to stick around with for a really long time. Or whatever, something equally gushy.
I'm kinda picky, and the thought that one might never find their "Dream Girl/Guy" is truly a terrible one, indeed.
4. Serious harm/death coming to family members and/or loved ones. That scares me much more than such things happening to myself does- know what I mean?
5. Becoming a senior/dependant adult, etc.
6. Hmm... those seem to be the big ones... can't think of much more that SCARES me. I'm impervious to the effects of scary movies, so I'll have to rule those out. It's one of my superhero powers.
7. Still can't think of anything... Pumpkins? I was scared of Jack-O-Lanterns when I was little!

Seven things you like the most:
1. Drawing till my penis explodes. (This happened once!)
2. The 'rents, immediate family, and friends! Though I don't tell them nearly as often as I should, which is something I should change!
3. Food- #2 of Chris' "Simple Things in Life That are Both Awesome and Radical". Seriously, good food is one of the best. Things. Ever.
4. Video games, in case no one could figure that out on their own. I'm the King of the World!**
5. Showering, which is #4 on Chris' STLTBAR list. Heh, Stilt-bar.
6. Taking my time with EVERYTHING. Be it drawing, eating (listed above!), or... I dunno, doing my hair; I absolutely relish in the comfort of abundance of time. Enjoy it while it lasts!
7. Late Summer/Early Fall weather. This applies to the climate where I live, because it really varies depending on where you are (obviously). But the kind of whether where it's cool, but you could probably still go out with a t-shirt and be fine, BUT you can still wear a jacket and be comfortable as well? AND THE LEAVES? AND THE MUSIC!!! AAAHHHHFALLLLLLUtsal;difja;ik!!!11!@$


Seven important things in your house:
1. My family?
2. My computer, since both it and I are joined by a blood bond that lasts for ETERNITY. I call it "Jambalaya".
3. Drawing board I've had since literally FOREVER.
4. Horde of video games/consoles spanning the years, including a near-mint condition copy of Mario 3, in the box and everything! Games have really influenced my art style, so I owe them many thanks and possibly tastycakes... if games could eat tastycakes.
5. My small collection of desktop caddies, which includes, but are not limited to: 12-inch Alien Xenomorph, 15th anniversary Optimus Prime, Master Chief (Halo 2 edition), one of those wooden multi-posable "Adam" figures that's supposed to help you draw poses (but I've never used), plush Treecko (from Pokémon), plush "Gloomy" bear, etc.
6. Pale yellow Cort acoustic guitar as 18th birthday present. Have yet to name it!
7. Love animals, so I have three cats and two dogs. The fine coating of fur on every article of clothing I own is a small price to pay.

Seven random facts about you:
1. I'm a slow learner So very sad but true.
2. I have three piercings (left and right ear, labret), and actually contemplated getting both nipples pierced, but declined when I heard that with men, they pierce the whole areolae area.***
3. When I'm happy I dance and run around my house and sing to my dogs, despite having company or not. Hmm... listen to "Break Out" by 80's band Swing Out Sister... give in to the urge!!
4. Don't drink, smoke, or do drugs, and don't plan to. Some folks in the 'scene' might call me "Straightedge", but I don't draw giant X's on my hands and I'm not a preachy Catholic (not a Catholic at all, in fact), among other things. Soo... I wouldn't use that label.
5. Contribution by my younger brother when asked: "You drool in your sleep". There you have it, folks. Cute, but horrifying? We'll chalk that up as another earnest con of mine.
6. NO GOOD at any and all sports, due to terrible hand-eye coordination and absolutely remarkable clumsiness.
7. I have had no less than five dreams in which I was Spider-man, or at least had the costume and the powers, which is about the most embarassing fact about anyone that ever lived in the history of man.

Seven things you plan to do before you die:
1. Alright, the first two are easy ones for ANYONE, as describled by Katie. Number one would be, fall into "harcore crazy fluffy-bear hot Sarah McLachlean love." And get burned by the molten LA-VAA!

...

I REALLY have no idea what I'm talking about.
2. Purchase dwelling of my own. "Mystery Mansion" would be preferred, but I'd settle for "trap-ridden dungeon", or "Peach's Castle".
3. Write and draw comics for various "Rim Edge"(the terribly-named universe in which all my stories take place) storylines of mine, and just get a stable career doing what I love- be it comics, character design, illustration- whatevah!
4. Learn to play the sax-a-ma-phone, my secret mistress!
5. Own two cats, named "Fucious" and "Léo", as in the short forms of certain historical figures' names. One of them must be a marmalade.
6. Travel someplace far, far away from where I am now. The first country that comes to mind is Japan, but I'm not entirely sure on that one. We'll have to see when I actually possess sufficient funding, hmm?
7. Have no regrets and be absolutely satisfied with the life I've lead when it comes down to zero hour for Chris. Again, that brings up the whole "Becoming old" fear listed near the top.

Seven things that attract you to the opposite sex:
- Aww, come on! Most of these are going to be obvious, but let's break it down.
1. Always, always been a mouth/lips person. Doesn't necessarily have to be crazy Angelina Jolie "two couch cushions pressed together" lips, but something unique and sensual can be very appealing for me, which segues nicely into the next on the list...
2. Nice teeth! I can't even really describe this properly, because there are people that have perfectly fine, average teeth, but SOMETIMES there'll be that person that has some unique quality to their teeth that spells "awesometude" whenever they smile. Hence, this ties in very closely to #1. Smile, you slut!
3. I don't even want to get started on noses, but believe me when I say there is something to a good nose that makes me feel all tingly.
4. Must be a, you know, smart person; someone with similar interests and whatnot but at the same time just enough differences so that we could have, I dunno... debates. This point might contradict number 5, which is...
5. Must hold the capacity to join me in being completely and utterly retarded. I am a big kid. Sometimes laughing and stupidity are like gold and silver woven though words and actions for me.
6. Alright, body type- this could take a while. A few years ago I came to terms with the fact that I prefer women of more shapely proportions. Now, before I confuse anyone, that doesn't mean "BIG TITS, YO." I just mean women with a healthier body size than those crazy ones that go for the uber-skinny build that's been popular in Hollywood and mainstream culture for so long. I don't know if it's the "Ar-teest" in me or what, but I always seem to prefer the "Hilary Duff build"****, or something hovering around that area. (not to say I'm immediately turned off by thin or average women, because that would be miles from the truth. I just prefer the other kind.
7. Similarities in musical taste has got to be pretty important. If I'm trying to listen to my Broken Social Scene CD and she's off listening to... I dunno, Evanescence or Nickelback or some other poor excuse for aural pleasure... I mean, it's over. I don't think this is going to work out, Supermodel Girlfriend from L.A. Pack up your thongs and cocaine and get outta my sight!

Seven things you say the most:
1. "YOU SLUT!"
2. "Apparently" - It's true; I use it waaay to often in conversation. No idea why.
3. "Balls" or "Balls to that", the latter of which I invented myself and am not proud of in the least.
4. "WHOPPER!", as in a reference to one of comedian Dane Cook's famous skits.
5. "Hot pot of coffee!" - "Anchorman" outtakes; actually, pretty much any line from Anchorman. It's the best worst movie ever crafted by man.
6. Taking any word in the Enlish vocabulary and adding a Japanese twist by SHOUTING it as loud as possible and ending the word in "-ARRUUUUU!!!"
7. "Penis". Seriously. They're just too comical to not mention at any random interval of conversation. It can be used to break awkward silences, and subsequently can be used to cause them.

Seven celeb crushes (whether local or foreign):

That's just a cruel question to ask a person who worked at a video store for two years! So many to choose from. Alright, this'll take focus and dicipline. *exhales deeply* Let's do this.
EXCLAIMER: This is based on a purely physical scale, since no one can really know what any celebrity is really like, personality-wise.
1. THORA BIRCH OMG. Well, at least before she went all blonde and... bleh. You might know her as the generic rebellious angsty teenage daughter from "American Beauty", or the very tongue-in-cheek Enid from the fabulous movie, "Ghost World", in which she starred with...
2. Scarlett Johansson So very glamourous, and makes more or less decent choices of what movies to star in, not to mention that whole mouth thing I talked about a few lines up. And I LOVE little moles/freckles. They are sex like whoa. So, "Scar-Jo"(shoot me) gets two rawrs up, I guess.
3. Rachel McAdams MORE LIKE RACHEL MCAWESOME. Currently on her rising star, you've more than likely seen her in "Mean Girls" (she's actually 28, I was suprised to find out), "The Wedding Crashers", or "Red Eye". She's got what I've come to call the "Claire Danes Effect", in that they can make any facial expression and it will make me want to devour their face. But, you know, in the cute way. *blinks* So many times I've wanted to walk into the local McDonalds and order the "Rachel McAdams", but alas, such is the stuff of fantasy. For now...
4. Elisha Cuthbert Dude, I can explain. I had a crush on her as when I was a kid spending my weekday mornings watching "Popular Mechanics for Kids". I thought that was it; but when I started watching the first season of the terribly addictive series, "24", how was I supposed to know that it featured a very much 'blossomed' Ms. Cuthbert? MY PAST HAS COME TO HAUNT ME, AND IT FEELS SO RIGHT. I guess you might've seen her in "Old School" next to the adorably fugly Luke Wilson, or possibly in "The Girl Next Door"; a movie for which I was bracing myself for another crappy teen comedy, but was suprisingly rewarded with some genuine laughs and a decent soundtrack, to boot.
5. Arg, I USED find the aformentioned 'Duff' to be attractive, but, well... see below. Er... you COULD have seen her in a myriad of terrible movies, all of whose names I would rather not mention out of fear of invoking their crappy 'tween garbage-ness.
6. Jennifer Connelly. An absolutely lovely woman who always seems to look great in her movies, be it as a coked-up miscreant in "Requiem for a Dream", a cute daydreamer with a thing for David Bowie in "Labrynth", or, I dunno... the Rocketeer's girlfriend! I still can't believe she's married to the guy who played the announcer fellow from "A Knight's Tale". It's a funny thing she's the first brunette on this list, since I greatly prefer darker hair... *shrug*
7. Brad motherfucking Pitt
8. Liv Tyler ~ I JUST WANNA LIIIIV! ~ Sorry, I had to make that joke. But down to business: How a beauty like Ms. Tyler could have had anything to do with the genes of a goblin like Steven Tyler of Aerosmith is completely beyond me. Is her mother some kind of supermodel? Is he really her father? Why should I care? Because I make an audible exclamation of shock and fear every time I see Steven Tyler, which is the opposite of what I feel when I see Liv. Something's not right there.

And that lead singer chick from "My Chemical Romance". I'D HIT THAT!

I PASS THIS ON TOOOO... Anyone who has a few minutes and very little to do!

*But seriously, see that movie. Effing hilarious.
** (Of Warcraft)
*** I shudder, but to be honest, what was I expecting? Women that apply the piercing with whipped cream and fairy magic?
**** Although it would appear that Ms. Duff has recently converted to the "skinny hoe" build, and all is lost. I've seen the pictures, and it's not pretty. I'm POSITIVE it has to do with her filthy pedophile boyfriend, Joel Madden, but that's a topic for another time.

Terribly sorry to those on my Watched list, because you probably just got buttsexed by a bunch of new (!) Deviations and Scraps. My apologies; I don't expect you to comment on each and every one of them (though, like all DA users, I do like-a my comments!).

Hope I didn't scare anyone who thought I had died or whatever, but I went through a bout of business with work and home stuff and kinda got out of the habit of updating. That, and I can't seem to find the time to make anything of decent quality, which means I submitted more "so-sos" than I would have liked. Oh well, content is content!

So what's been going on with my DA buddies? Anything interesting happen in the months leading up to what will do doubt be another fantastic summer full of ice cream, swimming pools, spyrographs... er... whatever else you kids do to keep yourselves entertained these days?

Me? Oh, I still do the video game thing. I've been WoW-ing it like it ain't nobody's business. Now that I've discovered the joy and pleasure that is the Horde, I can't go back to being the pussy flesh sacks known as Humans. The Horde just seems to have cooler Races and better areas than the Alliance. So sad

SEE BATMAN BEGINS. I just thought that that needed a paragraph of its own. Better than tropical island sex with Michael Keaton.

On a sadder (and very unexpected note), I got a message from DeviantART when I logged in, stating that my free account has almost expired and if I need to get a pay account to stay with DA! I give that a big "Doubleyew-tee-eff?" Is that really it? I pay for an account or this gallery gets canned forever? That seems like a sneaky move on DAs part, but perhaps it clearly stated this in the Terms of Use, which I'm sure no one actually reads.

If such a tragedy is absolute, then I'd like to bid a fond farewell to all my fellow artists that I met on DA! You deserve but the maddest of props.

Alright, I'm going to see if I can sneak in a couple more pictures today, so you'll hear from me soon! Ciao!

-CB

First of all, what the hell is this? Whatever. Any game that lets me have Klonoa and Cammy fighting side by side is guaranteed to make my ears bleed red candy.

So, I got a new monitor! Now EVERYTHING is as high-contrast and resolution as fuck, and I love it. I didn't realize how much of a difference this new-fangled LCD screen flatpanel junk would make. Still, almost five-hundred dollars in the hole... it's a good thing I'm a part time pimp/daredevil/Spider-Man, or I might not be able to afford such a luxurious piece of fine hardware.

Other than that, I've been engaging in much Counter-Strike:Source, SSX 3, and I recently purchased the game Ico for the PS2. I'm glad I picked that one up before it became too difficult to find a copy. Ico is one of those rare jewels that encourages the notion of videogames as art. It's a quiet, beautiful, and shockingly emotional adventure that leaves me with no doubt in my mind about the passion the developers must have put into it.

I'm think I'm about done here; I've submitted a few scans- both old and new- to my gallery to keep you entertained for a little while longer, and you can rest assured there's plenty more where that came from! Ciao!